When someone you care about ends a relationship, it can evoke feelings that range from disbelief to despair and everything in between. “How could this happen?” you think. “There must be something wrong with me.”

The same is true when someone with whom you’d like to explore a relationship doesn’t return the interest. “I thought I had a lot to offer—but maybe not.” When this happens—and we say “when” because it happens to nearly everyone—it’s easy to interpret the event as a painful rejection of the most personal kind. This interpretation isn’t merely hurtful; it can limit your future happiness, creating wounds and barriers that—if unchecked—can keep you from finding true love in the future.

For these reasons and more, when you’re interested in someone and that relationship ends (or doesn’t begin) it’s important to embrace a healthy perspective on what has just occurred. Here are some considerations to help you do just that:

1. Just the facts, ma’am. When a relationship comes to an unfortunate end, stick to the facts. Avoid piling on self-deprecating opinions like “This means I’m not worth loving,” or “Now I’ll never find someone to love,” or “I must not be very attractive.” These messages are not only untrue, but they can also generate even more pain than the loss of the person you cared about. In fact, if you find yourself more upset about what this breakup “says about you” than about the loss of the person you cared about, you are clearly heaping on self-condemnation and it’s time to alter your self-talk, even if that means seeking therapy to help you embrace a positive perception.

2. Realize that sometimes love simply runs out. When a breakup happens, that doesn’t mean you are flawed, nor does it mean you’ve failed. It may not even be about you at all. Sometimes, in the early stages, love just fades. It’s not necessarily about either partner. This is why it’s rarely wise to make a lifetime commitment within weeks of falling in love—the feeling may dissipate. It takes time to see if the love you share is the permanent kind. And if it’s not, it isn’t a statement about you at all. It simply means the relationship ran its course, and it’s better to discover that while dating than after a trip down the aisle.

3. Typically, breakups are more about a clash in vision than they are about any one person. Choosing to end a relationship usually occurs when one partner realizes something is out of sync with his or her vision for the future. We all have expectations about what we want from a long-term relationship, and sometimes reality doesn’t match up with those expectations. When that happens, it doesn’t mean that YOU are deficient or inadequate in some way; it simply means that WE together don’t have the necessary ingredients for an enduring partnership.
When someone you care about ends a relationship or declines to start one at all, the loss of that real (or potential) partnership is painful enough. So don’t add to the hurt by buying into the myth that it’s all about you.

by eHarmony

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Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the whole point of taking a vacation with your significant other to relax, relieve stress and enjoy each other’s company? I thought so, but I’m just checking because for a lot of people vacations turn out to be full of stress.

I have a few tips that can help you and your mate relax and enjoy your time together. You don’t have to go too far to leave your stress, cares and worries behind for a few days.

Spas don’t mix with stress

One of my best words of advice to anybody looking to avoid something is to go places where the thing you want to avoid doesn’t exist. At times that is easier said than done but it’s possible. You should schedule a nice spa day for you and your significant other because spas are a place to relieve stress and tension. Some guys don’t get excited at all when spas are brought up in conversations, but there is no denying a nice massage hits the spot. If the two of you spend a day or a couple of hours getting pampered the rest of the day should go smoothly.

Do something new  

If you eat at the same restaurant often or have a favorite thing you do together maybe you shouldn’t go there or do that on vacation. You both are familiar with it and adding some variety is usually a good idea. If you’re in a new city take the time out to experience what the things that make that city unique. Whether that be a meal that the city is known for (cheesesteak in Philadelphia or a slice of Pizza in New York) or a site to see (the Grand Canyon in Arizona) use the vacation as an opportunity to make new memories together. Experiencing things together like a Chicago holiday will strengthen your relationship.

Take turns

Sharing, taking turns and compromising are things were learn about growing up but it is funny how much we can struggle with these things as adults. A strong, healthy relationship involves a lot of compromise and so does a stress free vacation. Guys, if your significant other loves to shop and you really can’t stand the mall, would it be too much to spend a couple of hours with her going to stores? I have been through that myself and while it can be tough doing it will score you some points. And ladies if your significant other loves sports and his favorite team is in the city that you’re visiting, is it too much to sit through a game with him?

These are just two examples of compromising and they might sound funny but compromising is important. One person shouldn’t have their way all of the time.

Just remember, vacations are a time to get away from the stress and concerns of everyday life and to enjoy things. Have fun and enjoy your significant other.

About the author:
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Nan is a fitness expert and marketer who loves traveling the world to advise at sporting events. When she’s stateside, she enjoys spending time volunteering at environmental organizations and spending time with her lab mix, Cody. She blogs at http://www.eatbreatheblog.com.

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Knowing when to tie the knot can be hard to pinpoint. Timing is key for any life situation, and even more so for marriage. Choosing the right time to get hitched really depends on you and your partner, where you are in life and what you’re expecting from a marriage.

Knowing when to get married can be as simple as following your own life clues. Life can naturally tell you when you’re ready to get married if you look closely enough!

1)      You’re Financially Stable: While you don’t exactly have to be financially stable before getting married, it’s a really good idea. Being financially stable in and of itself can be indicative of a certain level of maturity, clarity of life direction, responsibility and self-fulfillment. Additionally, going into a marriage with your own finances secured means that you’ll both bring something to the table, both have something to lose in case something goes wrong and both have respect for each other’s money and assets. As a rule of thumb, if you can’t afford your diamond rings for the engagement, it might be a good idea to wait.

2)      You’re Ready To Start A Family: Knowing that you’re ready to possibly produce offspring with your partner is another good indication that you’re growing up, and that you might be ready to get married! While getting married doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to have kids right away, knowing that you’re ready to do so is always a comforting feeling.

3)      You Feel Complete And Whole On Your Own: A lot of people search for The One to be their other half, complete them and make them feel whole. And, while a significant other does play an important role in your life, you should be complete and whole with or without someone else. When you reach a point where you are happy with yourself, know what you want out of life and know what’s good for your development both personally and professionally, you’ll make a much better partner for someone else. You’d expect the same from someone else, right?

4)      You Can’t See Yourself With Anyone Else: Lastly, one of everyone’s favorite indications that it’s time to get married are when you know you could never see yourself with anyone else! Everyone gets to this place at a different time and may get cold feet here and there, but deep down inside you can tell when this one is different from the rest.

Getting married is a big decision, and one that everyone makes for their own reasons. Do what’s best for you and what feels right. Stay true to your feelings, be honest with yourself and your partner and don’t rush! You have a lifetime to spend together.

About the author:
—————————————————————————————————-
Nan is a fitness expert and marketer who loves traveling the world to advise at sporting events. When she’s stateside, she enjoys spending time volunteering at environmental organizations and spending time with her lab mix, Cody. She blogs at http://www.eatbreatheblog.com.

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I’m going to tell you something that’s going to save you a ton of time – especially the hours you spend dissecting a man’s behavior.

When a man doesn’t call once you’ve connected in a deeper way, there are only three possible reasons why:

1) He doesn’t know what to do with the connection you share because it’s not the right time for him

2) He doesn’t know what to do with the connection you share because he’s not mature or capable of getting any closer

3) Something was said or done that tells him that a relationship with you is not a fit for him.

There’s absolutely nothing you can do about the first two reasons. No matter how amazing you are, a man who isn’t ready for a relationship won’t suddenly become ready or mature because of anything you do, say, or are.

But screeching halt at number three, right? Your worst fears are confirmed: something you say or do CAN make a man turn in the opposite direction. Well, not exactly. It’s something else…

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THE “INSTANT RELATIONSHIP”

Many women, after knowing a guy for only a short while, let themselves get wrapped up in what I call an Instant Relationship. This is when a woman will already be thinking ahead that she is in a relationship with a guy, that they will be spending all their weekends together, and that he won’t be dating any other women.

And this happens when the guy hasn’t even talked about a relationship. Then the woman gets disappointed when it turns out he isn’t exclusive with her or isn’t making plans to see her on Friday.

So, instead of putting all your energy into creating this Instant Relationship, focus instead on drawing the man you want in and connecting with him on an emotional level. Here’s how…

START LIVING THE LIFE THAT WILL ATTRACT A GREAT GUY

Question: if a man were to simply join you in the things you were doing in your life… would he have a great time? Would he see you living a happy and full life? Would he be excited to be with you and do some of the things you’re doing?

Lots of women have great lives. But as soon as they meet a guy, they focus too much on giving to him or trying to please him.

They’ll do things like give up friends and hobbies and weekends for a man – only to realize that they “lost themselves” in the relationship.

Take a moment now to think about this. And then write down three things you can start doing for yourself that will make you more attractive to the kind of man you want to attract.

CREATE THE CONDITIONS FOR HIM TO “FALL” INTO A REAL RELATIONSHIP

There’s one thing that all men love and respond to, and it’s one of the most simple but powerful secrets to leaving a man wanting more. And this one thing is APPRECIATION. Appreciation to men is what affection and reassurance are to women.

Men fall in love not when a woman gives and gives to them, but through the process of having a woman they enjoy giving to.

So if you’re worried that a man will think you’re not interested in him if you don’t move things forward, here’s what you need to know: all you need to do is show a man appreciation.

Let’s say you’ve had a great date with a man and you definitely want him to ask you out again. All you have to do at the end of the date is thank him and let him know you had a great time with him.

The trick is to express genuine appreciation without any “hook” or conditions to it. That is the magic way that appreciation sinks into a man’s heart and lets him know a woman is special – and gets him thinking about her again right away.

When you make your life as rich as possible, the right guy will naturally want to be a part of it. And when he does show up, simply let him know you’re glad he’s in it. You won’t fall victim to the Instant Relationship…and you’ll create a solid foundation for a lasting, connected, REAL relationship.

By Christian Carter, author of best-selling eBook Catch Him & Keep Him and free newsletter

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If you’ve ever wanted to know what a man really thinks about dating and commitment, subscribe to Christian’s free e-newsletter. He’ll reveal the kind of qualities a man can’t help falling for in a woman and what it takes to make him give up his “single” freedom for the love on just one woman…for the long term.

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You know the type: he’s dressed to the nines, has the perfect hair, and emanates just the right amount of designer cologne. At a club or party, he’s been eyeing you from a distance until he finally sidles up beside you and delivers his well-practiced pick-up line. His flirty banter is kind of charming, and you wonder how you should respond to his offer to “get better acquainted.” After all, his smooth-as-silk approach to attracting women IS alluring to some — and a total turn-off to others.

What should you do if you encounter one of these slick guys? What’s more, can you trust a man like this to ever be more than a charming-but-shallow raconteur and pick-up artist?

Let’s admit that it’s easy to stereotype guys who come across patently polished and put-together. But lumping together all those suave, urbane types would be unfair. That’s because some men are naturally and genuinely gifted with an extra measure of magnetism and charisma. It’s not an act—they’re blessed to be cool and charming without trying.

So how can you tell the difference between the “real deal” and those who merely putting the moves on you? Be on the lookout for the following attitudes and actions. Although guys may not actually verbalize these thoughts, watch closely enough and they’ll become evident:

Alarming: “Aren’t you glad you’re with me?” Some guys exude arrogance and aloofness, sending the signal that you’re lucky to be in their presence.
Assuring: “I’m so glad to be with you.” And then there are guys who treat you with respect, courtesy, and generosity. They let you know in words and deeds that it’s wonderful to be in YOUR presence.

Alarming: “Let’s talk about me.” Smooth operators are often self-centered and egotistical, demonstrated by how much they keep the focus on themselves. Bragging, showing off, and excessively talking about oneself should always serve as a flashing neon sign to watch out.
Assuring: “Let’s talk about you.” People with a healthy self-esteem don’t need to be the center of attention all the time. They are eager to hear about your life, and they’ll listen carefully as you tell about yourself.

Alarming: “I’m a master of disguise.” Some men are highly skilled at adopting a persuasive persona, presenting themselves as something they’re not. If you detect a whiff of duplicity and deception, ask yourself why the guy feels the need to fool you.
Assuring: “What you see is what you get.” Most women want a man who is what he appears to be, with no hidden agendas or slick sales pitches. Lying and deceit dissolve trust, but truthfulness forms the foundation that a relationship can be built upon.

Alarming: “I’m easily bored.” Any relationship worth exploring and developing is going to take time and effort. But an impatient, impertinent person wants something new all the time. If you’re with a guy who seems chronically restless and distracted—always ready to move on to the next promising prospect—do yourself a favor and let him get bored with someone else.
Assuring: “I’m in no hurry—let’s see where this relationship goes.” Part of the fun of dating is discovering if initial attraction will lead to something more. Will early potential evolve into lasting love? That question cannot be answered quickly, and people who get bored easily don’t stick around to find out.

When it comes meeting new people, everyone is wary of manipulation and maneuvering. Be grateful that there are plenty of guys who value authenticity and don’t want to play games.

by eHarmony

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Relationships are a delicate balance. When things are going well some people are hesitant to make changes out of fear of messing things up. Others feel like they can’t get enough of a good thing and suggest living together. Living together changes the dynamics of the relationship and can put the tightest couples to the test. I’m not saying that to discourage you but there are certain steps you should take before moving things to the next level.

Having a man in the house is a completely different feeling than living alone. When I was living alone I would be sure to turn on my adt home security system all the time. Even when I was home I set it to beep every time a door was opened. When my partner (now my ex but that’s a whole different story) was there he would always turn it off and put on his macho routine saying he was all the protection we needed. Having another person there to keep you company and feeling safe is one thing but there is a lot more to it than that.

When you live alone it’s pretty simple—everything is your responsibility. You have to clean up after yourself unless you are willing to pay a cleaning service to come in and do it. Paying for the bills and purchasing and preparing food too are all duties you’ve got to do. When you’re contemplating living with another person, you may assume that two people to take care of financial obligations you were able to handle alone will be easy. That is not always the case. Before you move in with your partner you should have a serious talk about what you expect on a number of topics:

• How will the bills be split?
• How will the cleaning be handled?
• Who will need to get rid of furniture and what stays?
• How will you handle your finances? Joint accounts? Separate?

These are a few of the issues that may seem minor now, but if they are not agreed upon early they can grow to be major issues. Living together forces you to make sacrifices if you want it to work. When you live alone you have your own routine. You may not realize it but the things that you do may not be your partner’s favorite things to do. For example, you may like watch sitcoms and reality TV at night. Your partner may be a sports fanatic and want to watch his favorite team every night. Are you willing to give up your reality shows? Will you want him to give up sports? Will you alternate days or have two TV’s in the house? These are things to think about but as long as you communicate and set things up in the beginning you will be a step ahead.

About the author:
—————————————————————————————————-
Nan is a fitness expert and marketer who loves traveling the world to advise at sporting events. When she’s stateside, she enjoys spending time volunteering at environmental organizations and spending time with her lab mix, Cody. She blogs at http://www.eatbreatheblog.com.

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Once again, ‘tis the season for your annual quest to find the perfect Christmas gift for important people in your life. At the best of times, gift-giving can be a strange and stressful mixture of obligation and a genuine desire to show appreciation for the relationship. It’s hard enough to get it right with people you know well—close friends and family.

Where do you even start to select a gift for someone you only recently met? And not just “any someone,” but a person you think might turn out to be the romantic partner you’ve been looking for? The key word here is “might.” After only a few promising dates, it is still too soon to tell.

Suddenly you have a whole new set of things to consider as you shop, beginning with: “Should I give a gift at all? What will it communicate if I do? Should I give something special, to show my growing feelings? Or something ordinary to send the message I’m not moving too fast?”

Here are four tips that will help you hit the sweet spot when buying a gift for someone new in your life:

1. By all means, give. Honestly now, who doesn’t want to get a present at Christmas? Even as adults we can’t help but feel that delicious anticipation when handed a package with our name on it. To be remembered and valued in any relationship, whatever its nature or potential may be, is something we all crave and appreciate. Stop over-thinking the question—to give or not to give?—and just go with the spirit of the season.

2. Don’t overdo it. On the other hand, what you give really is important. There are two types of gifts that can backfire in the early stages of a relationship: one that is overly expensive and one that is overly intimate. In either case you run the risk that your potential partner will see the gift as a covert attempt to test the waters in the relationship, or to push it to a new level before he or she is ready. You want to choose a gift that simply says “I was thinking of you,” not “I was imagining our future life together.”

3. Customize it. It is equally important to avoid letting the pendulum swing too far the other way, with a commonplace gift that has no meaning at all. Now is your chance to have some fun and get to know your prospective partner better, to discover what he or she truly enjoys and values. Is he a rock-climbing enthusiast? Perhaps the latest book on the subject. Art lover? Tickets to the museum. A gift doesn’t have to be large or expensive to be personally meaningful. Resist buying the first typical trinket you see.

4. Leave your fingerprints. The best romantic gifts—even when the relationship is brand new—are ones that keep pointing to you long after the wrapping paper has been tossed. Example: A sampling of chocolates from places you’ve visited around the world; a copy of your favorite book, with a note about why it’s meaningful to you; a special meal you prepare from scratch. Put something of yourself in the gift—to let your dating partner know you better.

Dating and gift-giving go together like eggnog and Christmas cookies. Keep it simple and lighthearted—and enjoy another reason to celebrate.

Any gift ideas to share? Please do!

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1. Chocolate still makes for a nice gift
2. Build Trust in a Relationship or Marriage With These 7 Tips
3. Guys Guide to Giving Flowers

‘Tis the season to curl up on the couch with a cup of cocoa — and binge on nostalgic, feel-good movies. While rating the best holiday films is purely subjective, here’s a list of the season’s 50 best:

The Classics
These are the films that your grandparents approve of and for good reason: they’re wonderful.

1. It’s a Wonderful Life

Arguably the most-watched film each holiday season, George Bailey’s never-been-born adventure is sure to make you cry tears of life-is-beautiful joy.

2. Holiday Inn

Bing Crosby and Fred Astaire: what more do you need? How about the debut of the now-classic song “White Christmas”? Warning: this film will make you want to quit your job and only work on holidays.

3. White Christmas

After you’ve seen Holiday Inn, watch its Crosby-starring spin-off, “White Christmas.” Rosemary Clooney is a dream — as are the fur-trimmed capes and painted Vermont landscapes.

4. A Christmas Carol (1951)

The classic Dickens novel has countless adaptations. A top recommendation: the 1951 version starring Alastair Sim. It will destroy your inner “bah, humbug!”

5. Miracle on 34th Street (1947)

In this 1947 Oscar winner, Santa Claus is on trial. By the inspirational movie’s end, you’ll believe again.

6. The Bishop’s Wife

The non-musical inspiration behind The Preacher’s Wife, this film stars Cary Grant as an angel-slash-marriage-counselor. Enough said.

7. The Bells of St. Mary’s

More Bing Crosby, the face of classic Christmas movies. This 1945 film features a Christmas pageant at the run-down school he and a nun are trying to save.

8. Meet Me in St. Louis

This Judy Garland classic is on the list merely for the scene in which she sings a magical rendition of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.”

9. Babes in Toyland

Laurel and Hardy rescue Tom Tom and Bo Peep from Bogeyland in this 1934 adaptation of Victor Herbert’s operetta. Disney’s adaptation was released in 1961.

The Nostalgia
These are our classics, the ones we’ll make our grandchildren watch one day.

10. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

This hilarious, irreverent, everything-goes-wrong Chevy Chase vehicle will make you so thankful that your crazy family isn’t that crazy.

11. A Christmas Story

It’s probably cinema’s most famous Christmas wish list: Ralphie wants a Red Ryder BB gun. The super-quotable funny flick has been on must-watch lists since its 1983 premiere.

12. Home Alone

A kid has to fight off burglars after his semi-dysfunctional family accidently leaves him behind during the Christmas holidays. Hilarity ensues, but so do the warm-and-fuzzies.

13. Home Alone 2: Christmas in New York

Arguably better than the original, Kevin McCallister ends up in New York — alone. Ignore the plot impossibility and be charmed by a precocious Macaulay Culkin and the near-perfect score by John Williams. Note: Home Alone 2 was the most successful film of 1992.

14. A Muppet Christmas Carol

Michael Caine as Ebenezer Scrooge, Kermit the Frog as Bob Cratchit; this charming adaption is surprisingly faithful to the original story. The Muppets are trendy again, so why not include them in your holiday-movie plans?

15. Elf

This film is fast becoming a can’t-avoid classic. It has everything a holiday film needs: humor, hope, music, quirky romance, candy overdoses, and Ed Asner as Santa Claus. Even non-fans of Will Ferrell admit to being charmed by the man who believes he’s an elf.

16. Miracle on 34th Street (1994)

This remake of the classic film holds its own against the original. Richard Attenborough probably is the real Santa. He’s that jolly.

17. The Preacher’s Wife

We’ve mentioned The Bishop’s Wife, but we can’t ignore the remake. Denzel Washington makes for the perfect modern-day Cary Grant, and Whitney Houston’s powerhouse vocals will have downloading the soundtrack in no time.

18. The Family Man

This alternate-reality holiday film has Nicolas Cage in a George Bailey-like role, waking up one morning to a life he could have had. This film might encourage you to look up “the one who got away,” so avoid if you’re feeling a little vulnerable to Facebook stalking.

19. The Nativity Story

If “Jesus is the reason for the season,” then why not check out a Biblical account of that first Christmas?

Animated/Claymation
The holidays bring out the child in all of us. Here are our favorite animated and claymation films for this time of year:

20. A Charlie Brown Christmas

Bogged down by the chaos at the mall? This classic animated Christmas special seeks to discover the real meaning of Christmas. Spoiler alert: scripture trumps commercialism.

21. Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer

The 1964 stop-motion classic is a giant hug in storytelling form. Rudolph and Hermey the Misfit Elf feel like outcasts, but end up saving the day.

22. How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

The 1966 animated musical adaptation of Dr. Seuss’ classic book will make your heart grow three sizes with each viewing.

23. The Snowman

The book is wordless and so is the short film. The only silent entry on the list, this snowman-comes-to-life story is no Frosty the Snowman. It’s a dreamy, Academy Award-nominated masterpiece that airs in Britain (and around the world) every holiday season.

24. Frosty, the Snowman

The kid in us is still looking for that magic hat that will bring our front-yard snowman to life. If our Frostys ever did come to life, we’d go to extreme lengths trying to keep him from melting, too.

25. The Polar Express

A gorgeous motion-capture adventure, The Polar Express takes skeptical children to meet the man they no longer believe in. It’s narrated by Tom Hanks, everyone’s favorite everyman.

26. The Little Drummer Boy

It’s another short film based on a holiday tune. This 1968 claymation special follows the story of a humanity-hating drummer as he encounters the three magi.

27. Robbie the Reindeer

For die-hard fans of Rudolph, these BBC tales feature the adventures of Rudolph’s son.

28. Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town

The final Rankin-Bass claymation special in this list, Fred Astaire narrates the 1970 Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town special.

29. Lady and the Tramp

Looking for an alternative animated option this holiday season? Lady and the Tramp opens with Lady’s arrival on Christmas day and bookends with the following Christmas — and the completion of the classic Disney family.

30. Eight Crazy Nights

Eight Crazy Nights stands apart for two reasons: it’s not about Christmas, and it’s not for kids. Take a break from the Christmas flicks and watch Adam Sandler’s hilarious ode to Hanukkah.

31. The Nightmare Before Christmas

This movie is one you can watch before the others, as early as Halloween. Perhaps a little too spooky for the little ones, Tim Burton’s classic has residents of Halloween Town taking over Christmas.

The Dark, the Funny, the Action-Packed
Not every holiday film has to inspire a cuddle-fest.

32. Die Hard

On Christmas Eve, the terrorists arrive. This hilarious action-packed film stars Bruce Willis at his best.

33. Lethal Weapon

Donald Glover, Mel Gibson and Christmas. This classic buddy-cop film brings the odd couple together for the holidays.

Honorable mention: If you’re really trying to make your hilarious action movie collection work for you this holiday season, Ghostbusters II also takes place during the holidays.

34. Scrooged

A dark, satirical interpretation of A Christmas Carol, Bill Murray stars as a selfish television executive visited by Christmas spirits.

35. Trading Places

A rich man and a poor man trade places during the holidays in this 1983 American classic. Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy star in this emotionally satisfying satire.

36. Jingle All the Way

It’s so bad it’s good. Arnold Schwarzenegger stars as a father who goes to extreme lengths to acquire the season’s must-have toy for his son. Watch this ridiculous film after surviving a long day at the mall.

37. Bad Santa

Tired of the sugary sweetness in most holiday movies? Bad Santa’s dark no-kids-allowed screwball humor attacks sentimentality and commercialism but still has enough heart to keep you from hating the holidays. Note: this is the only R-rated Christmas flick on the list.

38. Gremlins

A horror-comedy written by Home Alone’s Chris Columbus, this black holiday flick warns viewers to never get their Christmas gifts wet.

The Romantic Comedies, Tearjerkers and Heart-Warmers
Sometimes, all you need is love.

39. Love Actually

This love-stories-within-love-stories film has fast become the number-one romantic comedy of the season. With a soundtrack to covet, Colin Firth and Hugh Grant to swoon over, and Bill Nighy belting out a painfully amazing “Christmas is All Around” cover, this flick is hard to turn off.

40. The Holiday

We still don’t understand the Kate Winslet/Jack Black pairing, but the charming British cottage surrounded by snow trumps odd casting choices. Moral of this tale: If you hate your life, visit England and fall in love with Jude Law.

41. About a Boy

Hugh Grant is Will Freeman, a bachelor who lives off the royalties of a Christmas song his father wrote. Significant character development follows, just in time for the holidays.

42. Bridget Jones’ Diary

The third Hugh Grant film on the list, this chick flick classic understands what it’s like to be single during the holidays — and what it’s like to run down a snowy street in your underpants.

43. While You Were Sleeping

Sandra Bullock cemented her place as America’s sweetheart with this film. She plays a lonely transit worker who saves a man’s life on Christmas Day and ends up spending his holidays with his family while he remains in a coma. Sure, it’s an odd little story about falling in love, but more importantly, it’s about finding (and cherishing) family.

44. The Family Stone

Meeting your significant other’s family for the first time can be intimidating, especially if that family is an eccentric one, headed up by matriarch Diane Keaton. This stressful little family drama won’t leave you uncomfortable. It’s a feel-good holiday movie in disguise.

45. Little Women (1994)

This isn’t necessarily a Christmas film, but the numerous scenes that do celebrate the season are heartwarming enough to make the list. Just try not to cry when a weakened Beth gets her piano for Christmas, or when the March sisters share their Christmas breakfast with an impoverished family the holiday prior. Also charming, a pre-Batman Christian Bale pulls Winona Ryder and sisters through the snow on a sled.

Watch with the Kids
We round out our top-50 list with family-friendly holiday movies.

46. Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas

After you’ve watched the classic animated special a few hundred times, give the live-action adaptation a go. The second-highest grossing Christmas film of all time (following Home Alone), the Jim Carrey-as-the-Grinch comedy captures the stylized world of Whoville while targeting commercialism more directly than the original.

And, yes, the Grinch’s heart still grows three sizes.

47. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe

This classic adventure tale is set in Narnia, a magical land that has been cursed so that it’s always winter, never Christmas. The arrival of Father Christmas signifies the end of the White Witch’s reign.

48. Jack Frost (1998)

In the 1998 film Jack Frost, Michael Keaton stars as a dad who comes back to life as a snowman following his untimely death in order to repair his relationship with his son. (The 1996 film of the same name is R-rated and features a snowman terrorizing a small town. So be careful which Jack Frost you sit down to watch together.)

49. Muppet Family Christmas

You can’t have too many Muppet films this time of year. This 1987 TV special has Kermit and friends visiting Fozzie’s mom’s farm for Christmas.

Also worth looking up: the It’s a Wonderful Life-inspired It’s a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie, and A Muppet Christmas: Letters to Santa.

50. The Santa Clause

Thanks to a rooftop mishap, Tim Allen has to take on the role of St. Nick, and in turn, bonds with his son. Nothing is more heartwarming than a father’s love for his child.

That’s our list. What movies make your must-watch list this holiday season?

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Call it intuition, luck or whatever you will, but most girls have a way of knowing when her boyfriend is going to pop the question.

When you’re pretty sure he’s going to ask for your hand in marriage, the next step is obvious: tell all your girlfriends, tell your mom and start looking at engagement rings at on jeweler like Blue Nile – and maybe leave a tab open on his computer.

Every girl dreams about her engagement ring. It has to be nothing short of sparkly, perfect and stunning. Unfortunately, your boyfriend probably hasn’t been dreaming about your engagement ring all his life. Chances are, he hasn’t dreamt about it all. He’ll probably just grab his best friend and go pick one that “looks nice” out after chowing down on a few Buffalo wings.

And, of course you’ll love him either way, but it would certainly be ideal to have your cake and eat it to, so to speak.

The solution: help him pick out a ring without helping pick out a ring. Sounds easy enough, right? Of course! Here’s how to make sure you snag the ring of your dreams, by way of your boyfriend.

1) Drop Ample Hints: We’re all a little absent minded sometimes, and that’s okay. Studies show that when being sold something, people need to hear something seven times before it really sticks. Seven. Yes, that may seem like a lot, but think about all the things we have to remember and suddenly, seven’s not so bad after all.

That being said, don’t be afraid to drop tons of hints about your likes and dislikes at every opportunity. If a ring commercial comes on television, comment on how you like the plain design. If a recently engaged friend shows you her ring, talk about how you like the strategically placed diamonds and sapphires. If you see a magazine at the grocery store checkout showing off a celebrity’s overly studded ring, comment on how gaudy it looks and how a simpler design would be much better. And the open tab for your ideal ring on his computer should help too. Repetition is key, here, in case you haven’t noticed.

2)    Shop Together: Try to shop with your boyfriend as much as possible leading up to the engagement. Even if not for jewelry, he’ll start to pick up on things you like and don’t like, maybe come to understand your taste and style, plus it will give you plenty of opportunities to continue dropping hints and cues.

3)    Use the Best Friend Stealth Tactic: You can always use his best friend for a little style hint sneak attack as well. If you think he’ll take his best friend with him to choose a ring, you can use the hint tactic on the friend as well, or even be more outright. Don’t pressure him too much for info, though. That could be a slippery slope. Work in hints when you can and ask general questions to see if he knows anything you don’t.

Most importantly, when the big day comes and he gets down on one knee, at least try to act like you didn’t know it was coming all along. And, be sure to compliment him on the fabulous ring he chose all on his own.

About the author:
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Nan is a fitness expert and marketer who loves traveling the world to advise at sporting events. When she’s stateside, she enjoys spending time volunteering at environmental organizations and spending time with her lab mix, Cody. She blogs at http://www.eatbreatheblog.com.

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Have you ever tried to communicate your feelings to a man only to have him shut down or pull away? I remember when I used to walk on eggshells around a man. That awful, helpless feeling of being so unsure of what I should express and how I should communicate, that more often than not I wouldn’t speak up at all. And, when I DID let a man know how I felt, it usually came out all wrong, and I’d end up pushing him away. It took me a long time to land upon a powerful combination of words that helped me be true to myself, get my needs met, AND help a man become completely devoted to me.

FIRST, FORGET THE MYTH THAT MEN ARE SCARED OF FEELINGS.

I know you may have heard that men don’t like feelings. You may have suffered some painful experiences with a man when you DID try to talk about feelings with him. But here’s what I want you to know: men aren’t afraid of feelings at all. What they don’t like is drama – when we unleash our pain, disappointment, and anger in the wrong way. That’s when you’ll see a man shut down, become defensive, and call you “dramatic” or needy.

STOP TRYING TO HIDE WHAT YOU’RE REALLY FEELING.

When we’ve expressed a feeling to a man only to watch him withdraw, we’ll often start doing something else: we’ll ignore the feeling altogether and pretend it’s not there. When he asks us what’s wrong, we’ll look away and say, “Oh, nothing.” But doing this actually creates MORE distance between you and a man! Why? Because he’ll sense that something IS wrong with you, and he’ll know you’re pretending. He’ll know you’re not being authentic, and it starts to make him wonder whether he’s getting the whole picture with you. And, because you’ve been covering up so much, sometimes you might not even know exactly what you’re feeling!

Your first task is to practice simply getting in touch with what’s really going on for you. If he was late to pick you up (again), stop and ask yourself what the core feeling is, and keep it simple: in this case, you’re probably angry.

USE THE RIGHT WORDS TO REACH HIS HEART.

What you say to a man really is EVERYTHING – certain words can make him pull away and make you feel like you’re losing him, while other words can draw him to you like a magnet so that you feel like the most important thing in the world to him. If you launch at him with an accusation (“You’re always late!”), then not only will you NOT get the resolution you want, but you’ll create more unnecessary tension. But watch what happens when you leave him out of it and focus on your feeling: “I feel really angry when I have to keep waiting, and I don’t want to be late.” See the difference? You’re not making him out to be the bad guy, and you’re not hiding who you really are. Now here’s the key — follow up your feeling with an offer of negotiation: “What do you think we can do so we’re both happy?” When you talk to a man like this, he can’t help but feel like he’s just won the lottery. He’s found a woman who isn’t afraid to show him her true self and who respects him enough to want to come to an agreement. Practice this the next time you’re feeling disappointed with a man, and notice how he starts looking at you differently…and responding to you differently.

By Rori Raye, author of best-selling eBook Have The Relationship You Want and free newsletter

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To learn more ways to express your feelings in a way that will make a man want to listen to you, subscribe to Rori’s free relationship advice e-newsletter. You already have everything you need inside of you to connect to a man deeply – and Rori’s simple-to-follow tools will show you how.

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